My first pregnancy ended in a miscarriage at just over 6 weeks. I was devastated to say the least. All I've ever wanted to be was a mother. As I am striving to pick up the pieces and start living again, I am finding certain things difficult. I have not been to the grocery store or the gym in over two weeks because it feels like that would mean I am moving on and leaving my baby behind. It's not just that. I use to love coke and would drink one every day before I got pregnant. Once I had that positive pregnancy test I made myself drink more water and wouldn't drink coke at all. Now that I can have it again. It just doesn't taste the same. I do not enjoy it. It's not that I don't have hope for the future. It's that I was this baby's only connection. I may not have carried her in my arms, but I carried her nonetheless and if I move on then she will be forgotten to this world.