1. No ice cream for two hours after dinner. It's locked in the freezer. Yes. Locked.
2. Vacuum under Constantine's seat after every meal.
3. Hang the bathroom mat over the shower rod after every shower.
4. Thoroughly wash out recycling. Egg shells can go in the compost, as long as they have been rinsed out. Coffee grounds can also go in the compost, but not too many.
5. Left-over food from Constantine's meals is to be swept into a dirty diaper and put out in the trash at the end of the day.
6. Turn off all the lights on the first floor at night. Apparently, this means even if we've been in bed for three hours while everyone else was in the living room, because last night when I got up at midnight, the lights were still on.
There will be others. There are always weird rules. I'm doing my best, I promise.
---Addendum. I can live pretty happily without ice cream. I can buy my own. In fact, I intended to buy my own until someone said, "Oh, we have a freezer full of ice cream, just have that." Ok, cool. Then, "Mom says we can't have ice cream until 8:00 because we need time to digest." I'd just like to say, everyone in this house except for my son is 21 or older. It's a little weird. And I'm trying really hard to just do what she says because I know that they're doing us a big favor letting us stay here. I'm just not a big fan of weird rules like this that under other circumstances would never fly with a grown, married adult. Some of the rules above are a little strange or foreign to me, but none of them seem grotesquely unreasonable. But then there's the completely arbitrary "because I said so" rules, and it's been a long, long time since she had any sway with me there. It's really frustrating to know that there is absolutely no rhyme or reason for some of the things she says but because of our crappy circumstances, there's nothing I can do about it.