She's a dear, dear friend. I love her with all my heart, and want nothing more than happiness for her in her life. She feels the same way about me. We have known each other for many years--adult, child-raising years. Only in more recent times has our friendship grown beyond the "moms of kids with shared interests" pattern to something where we can actually share interests of our own, grown up things like thrift store shopping and beverages with umbrellas in them. Which in turn led to the sharing of secrets each of us has buried for all our lives, finding at last an understanding ear to spill them into, and a warm heart to help us finally heal from hurts of long ago.
Recently though, she confided in me that despite 25 years of a loving marriage to a wonderful man, she finds herself with "holes" that cannot be filled. She is pleased and rightfully proud to say that theirs is a union in which they connect on every level...they stimulate each other intellectually and spiritually, have welcome companionship and deep abiding affection, and they work hard and well together in the raising of their family and building of their life. She knows that she is kind and generous to him both emotionally and sexually, and he to her. To him, their marriage is perfect. But for her, something is missing.
That "something" is her latent, long-ignored and surpressed, attraction to women. And this suddenly seemed to click for her in a new way when she came to the realization that she had started to develop a bit of a crush on someone.
A crush on me. Which she confessed to me in fear, thinking I would run screaming into the night....but of course I didn't. I love her, and I won't abandon her.
Still....what does one do with such weighty information?