New SixContest! What needs to change in 2023? Write a new law in six words!

Top Stump Speech in Six Words

First Day As President

Although Inauguration day is mere months away, it remains tough to predict who will preside in the Oval Office next January. For SixContest #73, we asked if you were seeking the highest office in the land, what promises would you make to prospective voters? From the idealistically ludicrous (“Give every citizen ten millon dollars!” –Matt_LoGuercio) to the genuinely achievable (“We women get that equal pay.” –JAD), these entries also reflect that the norms of society are evolving (“First Lesbian President’s spouse: Second Lady?” –JoC.). The Six Words community has spoken — here are the Top Six stump speeches:

6. “Patiently telling people it’s ‘Madam’ President…” —elmc

5. “I would just declare World Peace.” —LotLessMonster

4. “…the missiles fly, delivering love! LOVE!” —@rusmclaughlin (via Twitter)

3. “I’d paint the White House pink.” —@MertonKidd (via Twitter)

2. “So much winning you’ll miss losing” —@RealDonalDrumpf (via Twitter)

And the Six-Word stump speech that really delivers . . .

1. “All candidates to compete on Jeopardy.” —Lizasighs

Backstory that accompanies our top entry: “All candidates to compete on Jeopardy. Get rid of the dog and pony shows that have become American campaigns and debates. Where a lot is said, but nothing is, really. The winner will donate their winnings to a charity of their choice. Some suggested categories: The U.S. Constitution Foreign Policy Who lied? Healthcare Economics They said what?! Civil rights Geography Who hates us? World history Literature Miss Manners says Ecology World religions Batshit crazy, crazy, or crazy like a fox? A candidate’s name will appear as the answer. Potent potables [Ed. Note: a popular Jeopardy category].”

Congratulations to @Lizasighs and thanks to all who participated! Whether in our SixContests, on FacebookInstagramTwitterTumblr or at—keep on Sixing!

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